It’s not always easy
A friend turned to me the other day and said something of the like that “You should take it easy on yourself. You’ve already done so much work on your self, and transformed so much. Just enjoy life.”
I understood the sentiment, implying that I go hard on myself about my current condition, letting the advice in to ponder it…
I find that I am constantly faced with thoughts that are not of my own choosing, that are flickering echoes from the noosphere of the collective…that are imprints, passing tones through my Self, distortions that I am called to address. For if not I suffer. Whereby through the accelerated attainments of my own awareness, I feel I am demanded to respond and utilize the practices and techniques in order to clear my Self.
Such is my greatest challenge and my greatest virtue.
It has not been easy. It has been a wild ride. Whereby unclean and chaotic thoughts were imprinted upon me and constantly passing through me, while inundated in a culture lost unto itself…whereby normal occurrence and tradition appears alien to me.
Torment and hellfire within my own inner landscape, requiring tending, self love and forgiveness. To bring my presence to the moment in order to transform the energies, and find basic easement and peace.
Its not always easy….
Recently I have kept myself away from much of the common wealth and the alternative communites, for I find to be like a tuning fork in a cacophony … longing to hear the resonance of my true heart’s tone….and when i find a ringing between bells, a resonance in the air, I find solace, I find I am heartened – joined by those who share that tone. For how rare we are, jewels and gems in a cascading river, sifting out the roughage, revealing our true purpose. Harbingers of divine consciousness, beacons of awareness, reminding people of the Sacred Land. Guardians of the Rainbow Bridge.
It’s not lost on me. That my particular hue of embodiment, my savant type consciousness, is not of the mainstream. It is a more ancient tone, hueing to the tune of the eternal and the natural. Echoing of the land, of the archetypes, of sacred values, of Spirit and of Essence.
Form follows Function, as Peter Fae has expounded many times before. For in the great challenge lies the great gift. I see it now, how my sensitivities, psychic impressions, powerful visions, my intuitive nature…it all serves the great function of my divination, and the power of my word. It has given me perspective, having gone through it. Whereby i can relate to the suffering, and by going through the range from drudgery and confusion to bliss and revelation I actually embody the solution. Fundamentally and vibrationally. Through the experience comes wisdom – through embodiment we become remedy.
It’s still not easy. Many days I struggle, yet I am reminded of my purpose, and I come back to the practices, in order to clear myself…and embody the solution.